Sunday, November 9, 2008


I have been homesick today, which is strange as I am not missing a place and have no real home apart from where my family is right now. But, I am missing a people, a church, a way of life and a comfort level. I find this a bit of a new feeling. I've missed people before and certainly was sad and nervous and even angry when we moved in my childhood. This is different, though. I can't say why for sure yet.

We visited a church today. It was nice (enough). I find it hard not to compare to the church, the people, the spirit we are missing at Carmel Pres. When we moved last time, we left a church that had many issues, struggled and we didn't quite fit. We were excited about "church shopping" - a chance to find a place where God would use us, where we would fit, where we would feel at home. And, God is amazing--because he put us right where we so desired, blessed us and helped us grow in directions that we didn't even know about.

Now, having left that place, we are grieving. I left the new church today. Mike asked me "what did you think?" "I don't want to church shop. I just want some of Carmel Pres to move here."

Irrational. New place jitters. A bit melodramatic and melancholy. Yet, I understand when MeiLin says she doesn't want to go to her new school tomorrow because she won't have recess (the class lost recess time on Friday for being rowdy at lunch).

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